Halloween has just passed, the fake cobwebs are being packed away, and high street shop windows are shifting gears for the run-up to winter.
For a few days at the end of October, we actively lean into the chaos. We accept the fake cobwebs in shop windows, we put up with the sudden jump scares from trick-or-treaters, and we don’t mind navigating our way through the dark (or do we?).
But we only tolerate it because it’s a seasonal novelty. We absolutely do not want that experience when we are just trying to buy something from a local business.
The trouble is, a lot of digital marketing accidentally borrows those exact same mechanics, just without any of the fun. Without realising it, we hide basic details in the shadows, spring surprise obstacles on people before they’ve even looked around, and make it surprisingly exhausting for someone to simply buy what they came for.
If you’re worried your customer journey might be giving off eerie vibes, here are a few telltale signs that your marketing has accidentally turned into a digital haunted house:
The jump scares (aggressive pop-ups)
You know the feeling: you click a link to a lovely independent brand, and before your eyes have even focused on the homepage, the whole screen goes pitch black. A massive box leaps out requesting your email address, or worse, insists you spin a neon discount wheel before you’ve even seen what the shop sells.
It’s the digital equivalent of someone lunging out from behind a door and yelling in your face before you’ve had a chance to take your coat off. Let visitors look around the room first, set a timer before the pop-ups begin.
The maze with no exit (over-engineered navigation)
A customer lands on your site ready to book an appointment or buy a product, but they find themselves trapped in a labyrinth. They click ‘Work With Us’, which redirects them to an abstract manifesto about "our journey", which links out to a three-paragraph mission statement, yet nowhere is there a clear button that says “Book a call” or “Buy now”.
When people get confused online, they don’t treat it like an escape room challenge. They don't stick around to solve the puzzle; they simply close the tab and try someone else.
The ghosts of promotions past
Nothing breaks trust faster than landing on an otherwise lovely website in November and being greeted by a dusty banner offering "Guaranteed delivery in time for Mother’s Day."
The same goes for social feeds where the last post is a summer giveaway from eighteen months ago. It gives the distinct impression of an abandoned house with the lights left on. If you don't have the capacity to maintain a channel or update seasonal banners, it is far better to keep things clean, simple, and evergreen.
The creepy poltergeist (the AI chatbot)
There is a sensible place for automated FAQs, but there’s nothing quite as unsettling as a chatbot that pops up with a stock photo of a beaming "Sarah", desperately pretending to be a real human sitting in the room. The illusion shatters the second someone types a genuine question and gets bounced into an infinite loop of pre-programmed nonsense. It feels unnatural, and it immediately strips away the human warmth that small businesses do best.
If you use an automated widget, don’t disguise it. Label it clearly as what it is, a quick FAQ finder: “I’m an automated helper. Here are our opening times, delivery rates, and pricing guide. For anything else, please contact us at [email address or phone number]”
Turning the lights on
When you strip away the trendy hacks and complex conversion funnels, good marketing isn’t a puzzle to solve. It’s simply good hospitality.
You’re inviting someone into your space.
You want the room to be warm and well-lit. You want the signage to be clear. You want to answer people's practical questions without making them hunt for the answers, and you want the conversation to feel natural rather than forced.
If your website or digital channels are feeling a bit cluttered, confusing, or left in the dark, we can help you turn the lights back on. We work with local, independent businesses to tidy the journey and create a front door that actually welcomes people in. No more haunted houses.
Fancy a coffee (virtual or real) to see how we can make your marketing feel a lot lighter? Get in touch with us at CoLab Marketers.